For most people, it is SO HARD to say that one teeny-tiny word (which is funny, since it’s one of the first words we learn to say when we’re little.)

The thing is, saying “no” is especially hard this time of year, with all of its obligations and expectations.

But here’s something to think about next time you feel like you “need” to say yes…

When you find yourself saying YES to everyone and everything — and putting yourself and your own needs on the back burner — you’re actually saying NO to feeling your best.

So, be careful about what you agree to! 

Warren Buffet says, “The difference between successful people and really successful people is that really successful people say no to almost everything.”

When you say “no” in favor of taking care of yourself, you end up with more energy, less burnt out, and bringing more of YOU to everything you do. 

So, here are some strategies for saying “NO” this season, so you have more time for the people and events that matter most to you:

1. Be Direct. 
If it’s something that you really don’t want to do, be clear, honest, and kind.

  • When your schedule is full: “Thank you for the kind offer, but I’m already super booked this week.”
  • When you are being encouraged to eat dessert or other foods that don’t align with your health or your goals: “No thank you — but everything I’ve eaten is delicious. Thank you.”

2. Offer an alternative.

When a “no” isn’t quite right, find a middle ground.

  • When you don’t want to attend yet another food- or alcohol-focused event: “I’d love to see you, what if we get together for a walk instead?”
  • When you’re asked to bring homemade goodies for the office buffet: “I’d love to bring something, but I won’t have time to bake. Can I bring in something from [local bakery or store]? Or maybe a fruit platter?”

3. Raincheck

This is your go-to when an invitation or request competes with your priorities — i.e., spending more time at home creating your own traditions — or you are overbooked.

  • “This sounds fun, but I can’t make it happen. What if we got together next month?”
  • “Let’s have lunch or go shopping after the New Year.”

Remember: Every time you say “no” to something that doesn’t fit your own goals, schedule, or priorities, you’re actually saying “YES” to those goals and priorities…

You deserve it!

Committed to your success,

Lyonel Lumarque


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